When we were kids, our mother Jeanne used to take what we called an “ELD” – an emergency lie-down. As Wiggles has previously reported, an ELD usually took place after dinner, when, finally sick and tired of the 5 of us kids, she’d retreat to our spectacular `70s family room, complete with green wall-to-wall carpeting and framed Miro prints, and lie down with her arm over her eyes. then she’d yell, “Can someone get me a glass of water – WITH ICE!” As the youngest child, I was usually the designated scurrier, but that is a subject for another post.
Today, Jeanne took an ELD of another sort when she did a face plant in the lobby of my apartment building after coming over for lunch. I wish i could tell you that it was from the wine we served, but no, since there was no wine. all Jeanne drank was a glass of iced tea with a seltzer chaser. I was almost at the front door of the building when I heard behind me a hearty thunk, followed by screaming from both Jeanne and Sassafrass. Quickly, I dropped my fabulous “Sharif” bag that Wiggles had sent me and which holds any number of magazines, books, changes of clothes, and boo-boo, if i have to. Then I went running to see what had happened, trailed by Abdul, the doorman. Sassy, Abdul and I rapidly formed a human tripod and got Jeanne back on her feet, but Sassy and I were shaken. We knew Jeanne had recovered her equanimity and balance, however, soon after arriving at Sassafrass’ new apartment. Jeanne told Sassy a mere 10 minutes after walking in the door that Sassafrass hadn’t placed her furniture correctly. “The couch needs to go on the short wall,” she instructed. “That’s what they’d do on HGTV.”