Have You Ever Broken a $20,000. Piece of Equipment?

At work?

The All Important Spectrometer, Shown Without Treacherous Wires

By falling flat on your face?

Luckily, I wasn't wearing a skirt!

I had a shop full of customers who were entertained by my buffoonery.

Ours, however, were not so jolly. More like hot, grumpy sardines. My flying antics were a nice bit of comic relief as desperate citizens waited to find out how much their treasured tshotkes would fetch as gold climbs to all-time highs. It’s the modern day Gold Rush of San Francisco around here.

All of my coworkers killed me with kindness, making me even more embarrassed. One of them has demanded to see the surveillance tape. “I swear she was airborne,” he insists.

My mortification only grew when the Boss, as soft spoken and gentle a soul as ever has been, announced to the staff that repairs on the spectrometer would take three, count ’em, three weeks. During that time we would have to revert to old fashioned methods of scraping, filing, and acid testing jewelry. Wearing protective goggles and sweaty disposable gloves. While crammed elbow to elbow at the work tables.

And the Boss keeps the shop nice & toasty. Sweatshop, here I come.

All of these old-fangled methods would slow down the process, so anxious customers would be waiting even longer. Plus, our new/old procedures would give less precise results, affecting the profits. Have I mentioned that gold prices are at an all-time high? Why he’s requested me to work full time, I’ll never know. Maybe that’s my punishment.

I’ll tell you one thing: After my unprecedented and unplanned zeppelin interpretation, I sure wasn’t worrying about the books being off by a mere $49.50.


2 responses to “Have You Ever Broken a $20,000. Piece of Equipment?

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