Wiggles Buys a Back Fat Bra

This super-duper "Gigantor" model is my new best friend.

Thank you, Mr. or Ms. Lane Bryant.

For lo these past few decades I have bought my brassieres exclusively at Adele & Agnes, an intimates emporium in Englewood, New Jersey. Yes, I flew cross-country for my scanties. (Though, as you can see above, they’re now on the jumbo scale.) Sassafrass’s entire dainties wardrobe hailed from the fabulous offerings lovingly sold at dear old A&A.

Without warning, I arrived in N.J. a few years back only to discover my trusted undergarment supplier shuttered and gone. The shock has yet to subside. Back in the day when I  flaunted the braless look as a carefree lass, I accompanied the curvy Hot Pants to this very boutique, where the ladies scolded and warned me that gravity would find me someday.

Boy, were they ever right. Somehow I’ve managed to lose 30 pounds and still require the same bra size.

Luckily, Lane Bryant features a special back-skimming model that covers and smooths unsightly bulges, of which I have plenty. It’s amazing what fresh elastic and colossal square footage of fabric can do to improve one’s figger.

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